**New Late Nite Poem**

**I really should be sleeping but....**

Silence consumes me

her voice echoing relentlessly inside of me

solitude finally giving peace to my thoughts

My destiny appreciates her

finally quieting whispered expectations and dreams of past generations

inaudible directions of where i should go

reminders of the imaginary eyes that watch my every move

my definition just isn't good enough

Fuck it.

I can't be like you

My silence drowns them out with her sweet reverie and time to just Be

Erasing all the connected shoulds coulds and will

I am captivated by what now is

as blue shadows form my reflection on the ceiling

Now is Me

Now I am

Moment to moment

Living just to Be.

**NY Breakdown**

You pulled me in, led by hands extending from the underground melodies

echoing from your subways

Lyrical stylings from the originators still thriving on your walls, yet saving room for those yet to come

You

intoxicated me with the ways you broke every rule

turned your back to every norm

you were your own world and I

wanted to exist in it

I wanted to color your skies brilliant turquoise and rich chocolate browns

paint my vision on skyscrapers, make it a part of you

wanted to dance on your streets with the city lights that posed as stars as my only spotlight

wanting to share my peace with you as old school cats once did on your avenues

I can hear Malcolm quoted, revealing the lie traveling in your wind

or west coast revolution charging across your bridge in the form of majestic black panthers

as this generation's street dreams now cover the avenues with messages trapped in wet cement

can't stop

won't stop

can't stop

won't stop

Til they can drive their caddies in your skies park on a cloud

smoke a L and just cool out with gold shades on their eyes

I want to feel you in my blood, pumping through me, taking me higher

I want to fly in

your world with people who mixed willingly yet unknowingly

forming a force of unstoppable kinetic energy that was whole

that was one

But no one forgets exactly who they are

I wanted to love on your fire escapes under your cloudy night skies

with one who shares a common light with me, a memory to remind me no matter where i go

there's nothing like a BK love affair with the smooth sounds of poetry over a jazz infused hip hop beat

Our soundtrack to my life with you

and when I'm through

I want to chill on your stoops and watch your people float by as you go

deeper

get deeper

get deeper into me

I want to be branded

I'll give the fire, you bring the mark

Because in a world of black and white

you're a cool kind of blue

Though the Ill will always have my heart

he was my first, he made the woman I always see before me

every relationship has its time

and you NY have drawn me and my image live in your basements

amongst the scent of Ls, the taste of liquor and the feel of paint

my image floats in between the bass beats of the music

she is sustained on the words of your poets, MCs and vocalists

and she is seen in the dreams of artists and relived on their canvases

NY you are inside of me

Break me down

to my core, reveal the sun that glows inside

NY break me down

show me my message, hand me a permanent red marker and tell me to leave my mark in the heart of the city , transform my art

NY break me down

down

down

I'm

down.

**New Poem** Untitled (I've been feeling this lately)

**its hardly finished but i thought i'd post it, let it marinate and come back to it**

I keep pressure locked up under my bed
his unrelenting pursuit of my success plagues my dreams
I can't shake him
I feel him every night, pressing down against me
forcing down upon me his ideas of stability
raping me of my fantasies and childhood dreams
constraining me in life's complexities
concealing all it's simplicities
his voice always escapes the incarceration i keep him in
haunts me when its time to sleep
and when night covers me, i cling to happiness
he sleeps beside me as i find peace in his simplicity
soothes the pain the stress the pressure of success places on my shoulders
My saving grace
Helps me to remember the things that matter most
Holds me close and hums a melody that resonates serenity
a lullaby to drown out the moans of the monster under my bed
with a wave of sunshine and sultry rainy days
till a new day comes with the dawn and i'll follow my heart
she'll guide me through
watching over me in the daylight
til evening falls again, making love with my Happiness throughout the night...

**dont know where i'm going with this, hopefully it will reveal itself when i attempt to re-write in upcoming days**

Untitled....(a working poem)

**This poem was inspired by "The Snow Man" by Wallace Stevens....I'd never heard of him before but a line in his poem really struck me so here it goes...**

...And he, nothing himself, beholds nothing that is not there and nothing that is
Caught in the continuum called time
in the pursuit of worth
based on tradition set forth by the ones before us
and The ones before them
A tradition that states clearly he is NOTHING
Without the validation that proves the American dream has replaced our true beliefs
And our pursuit for happiness has been put aside for the pursuit to be a Capitalist
Anything outside of that is to be labeled a Rebel Anti-American, Socialist or maybe even Terrorist?
So the phones can be tapped and my home ransacked to make sure I don’t hijack the next plane to D.C.
all in the name of the fear of the people with racial insecurities
We've all been through Darwin’s education system
Only to find the things we learned were false images of society
trying to conform us to their reality
While brothers with the minds of Malcolm, Huey P. and Bobby
Are now prisoners of war, held captive in Special Ed classes
Led to believe because they have nothing, they come from nothing
Nigga, you are nothing
So our brothers transform to hustlers and hustlers to gangstas
Sustaining themselves on caddy dreams and
thinking of the next scheme to try and get that green
when they could be warriors for their community
instead of another statistical "casualty of the hood"
Never knowing to not fall at the feet of the lies to try to rule the power burning inside
He cannot abide by the dominant puppet strings and stand for himself
and so HE, beholding the nothing that never existed, realizes Something must be changed:
His Heart.

--sunshyne